How SWEET it is: Derwin Wins First Open Championship
League Runner and Rose Enthusiast, Dan Derwin
- STATEN ISLAND, NY
The air was sweet on October 27th, to kick off the 2024-25 Mediocre Bowling season, when 44 bowlers arrived at Rab’s High Roller's Lounge ready to battle it out on the lanes at The Sweetness Open. Claudia’s Affection, returning for a second year as the event’s coveted hardware, stood glistening, fresh with gold spray paint and glitter, surrounded by a swath of fresh roses picked up on the way to the event by Co-Commissioner, Dan Derwin.
“It just felt appropriate, the roses,” Derwin was overheard saying at the counter of Gennaro’s pizza, “It's a rose event…The Sweetness has a rose, everyone can take a rose home…I love roses. Rose.”
Excitement was abundant with new members mingling with seasoned veterans. Katie Marks and Krista Hasbrouck perched at the bar to take it all in.
“We don’t know anybody, here…but my bowling mantra is to ‘Make It To the Pins’ and that’s what I intend to do today.” Hasbrouk was quoted by Press in the High Rollers Lounge before the event.
“Was that really Press?” Marks inquired with her when a microphone holding bowling enthusiast moved on to interview others.
Lots of action, as well as wildly colored attire.
The lanes fired up for the first of 3 games and Ryan Petersen kicked off the day with a poor performance. But a stream of self-flagellation ensued that yielded results, his game took a turn and he ended the first with a promising 165 (and ultimately 150.7 event average).
The day saw not only one but two new additions to the MBA’s most exclusive Turkey Club, veteran Joseph Piergiovanni who strived for seasons to achieve his goal (only throwing a Turkey one time in his career, during a seasonal tournament when the award was on hiatus). After throwing a 93 in Game 1, he crushed his second game with a 196 and finally received the precious hardware pin.
Conversely, rookie Katie Marks joined the club in only her second game, showing Piergiovanni that if you really want something - you just gotta cut the bullshit and get it done.
Piergiovanni explain to Sean Kuhl that if you try hard enough, over 10 years, maybe you'll win something.
Meanwhile, on Lane 19, technical difficulties disrupted Game 1 forcing Jon and Jill Marotte, Vincent Fabiani and Allison Cavalle to relocate mid-game to Lane 10 to complete the rest of the tournament.
“Shenanigans! I smell shenanigans!,” Marrotte could be heard telling the kids on Lane 9 over a basket of chicken tenders, “The corruption is starting already, I want an asterisk on this season.”
Meanwhile, most of the lanes suffered with the usual hijinks bowling brings: “The Curse of the 1s”, defined by knocking 9 pins down, with only one remaining to taunt you in your second frame.
“It’s giving me the finger!” Billy Hamill, of Tennyson Drive, loudly complained watching frame after frame of single pin pickups plague his game day. (For a modest fee, we'll give you his full address.)
By the end of the second game, it was clear the league Commissioners were poised for potential wins (“Shenanigans!” - Marotte) with Hillary Scott averaging 162 after the second.
But end of the day it was Dan Derwin, haunted by the loss of the season finals against the 2023-24 Champion Kevin Rogers in March, who won and walked away with, not only the event’s trophy, but all the fresh roses he brought, with an average of 163.
“I’ve been waiting for my comeback moment,” he commented, “It’s all going to look great on my mantle at home.
Justine Candrilli took home (yet another) Gutter Trash Award throwing 14 on the night. She was tied with Carl Gallagher, but the tie breaker then went to least strikes: they BOTH had 2! Finally, the least spares thrown. Candrilli had just 3 to Gallagher's 9. "I really earned this one." she said to an endless sea of fans surrounding her car. "Alright get the hell out of the way I want to go home."
Sweetness Open artwork could be seen above adorning the score screens above the lanes. We've made it, folks.
See everyone for November's Knock'em Back Masters on Sunday November 24th!
EVENT SCORES
Event Winner: Dan Derwin (163)
Gutter Trash Award Winner: J. Candrilli (14)
Highest Total Strikes: 10 (Dan Derwin, R. Petersen)
Highest Total Spares: 11 (Dan Derwin P. Drozek)
Highest Total Gutters: 14 (J.Candrilli)
Highest Score: 196 (J. Piergiovanni)
Lowest Score: 66 (C. Gallagher)